Reflecting on lives lost

Sometimes things happen that might completely change your life.   Sometimes for the worse, but hopefully for the best.   Sometimes we don't expect these desired changes to ever take place.   And then one day you get an overwhelming feeling that NOW, now it is time to proceed to the next step.   

Well, we might be approaching one of those moments.  And really it's kind of exciting and scary all at the same time.   Not sure when I really want to announce what that is exactly.   But just know that good things are coming to our family.  We truly are blessed in almost every facet of our lives and we like to extend those blessings to those around us. 
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Recently we lost our dear sweet mother, Mary Randolph - Chris's mother.   On August 14, 2014 she passed away into the world of spirits.   She was kind, thoughtful, loving and a joy to be around.   She loved her family and clear up till the end she would light up when a grandchild would come into her sight.  We had a very great experience for about two weeks.   I could feel the spirit extremely well the days prior to her passing, and there were moments of laughter as we reminisced and told stories, and there were also moments of great sadness knowing what was about to happen.  Even as I type this the emotions are coming to the surface again. 

It was such a different experience to go through the death of a loved one and not be so far away geographically to know what was really happening.  It was sweet, it was tender, it was very spiritual.  It's always hard to think of living on without someone so loved and important to her family.   It's almost hard to comprehend that life really does go on for everyone else.  

Sometimes as I make the drive down to Santaquin, where my in-laws live, I feel like I'm going to show up there and she'll come walking out from her bedroom.  (and I would just jump for joy to see her even do that - as she couldn't walk really at all the last several months of her life).  She is missed everyday!  Little Esther will come up to me and say, "Grandma's in heaven."   She barely turned three after Mary's passing.  I am amazed at how much she knows at such a young age.   

It was definitely a rough time for our little family, because we lost her on one day, and the next day we heard that the first Bishop that we had after we bought our home here in Provo was killed while on the job.  It was a major shock to the ward, stake and neighborhood.   He was a great man, and as Christ like as they come. We were unable to attend any of his services because everything was at the exact same time as Mary's.  It was such an emotional time, but I'm so glad that the family was able to ALL be close and have those last few days with her as she was crossing over.   


Then just a week ago, a month after the funerals for the other two people, we found out that a young father age 30 unexpectedly died from a pulmonary embolism.  His cute wife just gave birth to their second child 8 weeks before.   I'm amazed at her faith through this.  I had the chance to talk with her two days after he passed away and she is a strong woman.  I want to be like her.  Life is so precious and fragile, and there really is no time to harbor ill feelings towards those you care about, or are part of your family.  

My sweet two year old ....

 There are advantages to having a cute little two year old, and photography equipment. And oh yeah, knowing how to take an excellent photo.  So, with both of these photos it was completely impromptu.  The first one I had set up just to practice with my flash and using the backgrounds and where I should place the light.  She was in her pajamas still and I think she might have even had "stuff" on her face.  She's still stinking cute!   













This bottom one is from right after doing a newborn session for a friend.   Esther saw a piece of hard foam equipment that I had in the room and she moved it over and said, "Take a picture Mommy!"  she wanted me to, so who am I to say NO?   Right, so I worked with it.  Now I really want to take off and do more "studio" types especially during the cold months so I can keep busy.    So just remember if you want to schedule a session contact me and lets work something out.   (wendy@wlpmemories.com)

That smile!  It's kind of her "I'm a stinker, but know I'm cute" smile and I wouldn't have it any other way.    Here's to having a cute little two year old running around.

Esther at 2 months

So another month has past and my little girl is now two months old.

 ( Again more for my benefit than anyone else's and this was started on November 9th and now it's the 12th ...oops that goes to show you what life with a newborn can be like.) 

• You love to sit in the swing.
• Your brothers and sisters love to hold you.  
• You were blessed on the day you tuned 2 months old. 
• You are starting to show smiles and the kids get all excited when you start to smile for them. 
• You are still very spitty, and can be quite gassy.  
• You love your pacifier ( and I love it too) 
• You love to be snuggled and wrapped up in your blankets.  
• You sleep well when you actually fall asleep.  
• You had your first Halloween and we dressed you up as a ballerina. You are so cute!

First picture was taken on October 31st, 2011  and the second picture was taken Oct 23, 2011 -- you are growing so fast, and I know this is just the start of more fun times to come.  We love you Esther!

Maternity Pictures from August 16th, 2011

So I had a great friend of mine who is talented and just plain AWESOME take some pictures of me a few weeks ago.   Here are some of my favorites.   And now, it's just a few more days until the arrival of our little Esther girl.   Tuesday SEPT 6th will be her birthday ....UNLESS something changes between now (Sept 2nd) and then.   Chris is taking me out tonight for a "last FRIDAY date night" before we have a baby again.  And last night on top of all the regular pregnancy pains and ailments... I stepped on a bee or wasp and ended up with a "sting".   YES it hurt!!!  YES I cried!!!  YES it throbbed most of the night causing me to get very little sleep!!  YES this resulted in me taking a two hour nap today!!   

But Chris being his funny self ... when he realized that I was stung and I was hysterical and completely freaking out and crying like a big baby ... said something like, " Oh my, I think you are allergic your foot is already swelling up"     REMINDER:  I have had swollen feet for 2 months now.   I wasn't laughing when he first said it, but about 15 - 20 minutes later it came back to my mind and I was laughing in the middle of crying ....If that is even possible.

I like this picture ALOT... except you can really see how fat and ugly my feet are and have been. haha.

 

Final week of Summer Break

Here I am at the closing of another summer break and my kids are about to start school once again. This year I'll have four in school ALL day and one little guy at home for just a few days until we have our little Esther. Then I'll have the two at home. I'm sure Ethan will be such a big help with his little sister that I'll just savor up each moment I get to spend with the two of them.

So as that time comes closer and closer, I can't help but feel like this summer has just flown by. Mainly because I was undertaking a huge project that I just finished up this last weekend. I'm glad to have that out of the way, and now I can really focus on getting my house dejunked now. The dejunking was put aside when I took on this project through delegation and then got sucked into it. But it can be revealed shortly what exactly it was, but until then it will have to remain a surprise.

I can't believe my children are growing so fast!! I'll have a first grader, a fourth grader, 6th grader and one in 7th grade this year. I seriously can't be this old already. Not to mention that baby 6, our little Esther will be here in just a few short weeks. But I guess it is possible to have all of this, when I started having kids in my early 20's.

The one thing about pregnancy that I wish I could capture would be movements this baby has been making for the last several months. I could do without the swollen feet, the pain in my back and other pregnancy side effects that make it feel like a miserable experience. But the movement I love!! Even the hurtful movements like she's trying to bust out of there... haha.

I'm still not quite ready for the little lady but I do believe I can get caught up within the next week or so and get to where I was hoping to be at the beginning of the summer before I had to take on a huge project that became my life for the last 2 months. But that's okay... it's all working out.

I'm completely overwhelmed with the thought of adding another child, but know that everything will work out somehow. I just need to have faith and know that I can do this. The kids are all excited, and Ethan seems to be the most excited. With school starting up and a new baby coming really soon.... the house work needs to be getting done on a regular basis, and as of late because of my project things were getting left undone. And by the time I've had a minute to do something, I chose to snooze, or sit down and do nothing instead. So I've got my work cut out for me and need to get a school schedule completed so that my kids will know what needs to be done and when. (And hoping that they will adapt to that very quickly).

So now I get ready to resume my normal life and get things back on track and develop our schedule all while feeling the life within me moving around as a constant reminder that things are about to change again. Here's to getting things done and not feeling quite so overwhelmed about being a new mommy again.

A Few Busy Weeks

So we've been up to a few things lately.  

Katherine's softball team had a lot of rainout games during the month of May and basically the games all had to be made up in about a weeks time.  So we had three days in a row plus Saturday where we were attending her softball games.  And on top of her games we also had games for our boys too.  So we had overlapping and busy nights for a week.  I'm glad that's over.

Kaylee was able to attend her first Youth Conference this last week and she loved it.  She was very tired when she got home and just wanted to sleep. So I let her!!  Better to have her get some sleep then have her be grumpy.  

We also went to opening game night for the Orem Owlz and got to see a great game, and fireworks after the game.  But a bonus happened when we were able to let the kids run the bases after the fireworks.  I'm excited to watch more games even being pregnant.  

Then later that same week, we went down to Manti for the Mormon Miracle Pageant that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints puts on to help tell some of the history of the church.  The kids liked it, and so did Chris and I. All except the pesky mosquito part.  We did get home after 1 in the morning.  And had two appointments to be at by 9am the next morning.  

Friday was our 13th anniversary.  We didn't do a whole lot except for hang out at seven peaks for a few hours, and despite my efforts trying to protect my family and myself from the harmful effects of the sun, we all ended up sunburned, except the two younger boys.  Chris has it bad on his upper body, while I look like a lobster on my bottom half.  So between the two of us, we're a completely sunburned person.  OUCH!! 

After we came back from Seven Peaks, the two of us took our turns showering off the "pool" water so we could slip away and spend some time just the two of us.  We went to Cafe Rio ... YUMMY!! for dinner, and really enjoyed our meals.  Afterwards, we just spent some time running a few random errands, and trying not to be totally uncomfortable as the unknown sunburns were making their marks on us.   

So Saturday the 25th we spent the morning at Thomas's last T-ball game and then came home and took it easy for the most part.  Later that afternoon, we attended our ward's block party and had a great time.  (Chris didn't go, but I don't blame him and Ethan was sleeping at first so I left him at home with Chris)  The kids had a blast with the face painting, the pony rides, the balloons and friends ---- I had the chance to chat with a few of my friends while the kids were occupied.  It was really nice.  

It's been a long weekend and a few nights of lousy sleep because of the sunburns, but now I can feel that I'm getting a little better. 

Today (June 26th) while at church, I started having some swollen feet and ankles.... so my feet have hurt most of the day, but I've also been able to get a good nap in while I had my feet elevated.  I slept really good.  

Now I'm thinking that maybe I should schedule in a nap everyday from now till the baby gets here.... and then after if I can.  haha... 

And I think that SUMMER is officially here, because it certainly has been HOT!!  I sure hope I can handle the next two months without completely dying.  It's amazing to me, how when I'm pregnant things seem so much more unbearable .... gee I wonder why!!??

Pictures to come later....

Random summer/pregnancy thoughts

Okay so I've been pushing along the last few weeks since summer has started for my kids and for me, for that matter.

We had the first week as a break with no waking up early to have anyone anywhere on time. Then the last two weeks for four days each week, I've had to have two of my kids at the school for their summer reading camp. Which hasn't been bad either. After that we head up to a local school where they provide lunch free for kids. Which my kids have enjoyed. (So have I, because I don't have to come up with anything for lunch)

I've also woke up a few mornings this last week and completely forgot that I was pregnant. I know, how can I forget?? Trust me, I don't know how it happened, but I can assure you that it didn't last forever. I woke up and was shocked to see that I had a swollen tummy and then it all comes rushing back to me. OH yeah... I'm growing a little person inside of me.

And as this pregnancy started as an unexpected surprise for us, I also feel confident in knowing that this baby will also be the caboose for our family. We know this baby is a little girl, and though I was fighting back the tears when I found out, I'm now overly joyed to welcome a little girl again to our home.

I still have moments though, when my other girls are in each others faces and fighting or just having a hard time getting along for whatever reason, that I start to cry because I know another girl is on the way. I'm hoping though that she will have a mellow personality and that she won't be full of Drama like her older sister Heidi is. (and sometimes Kaylee and Katherine).

I feel this lady moving around all the time, and my kids are telling me how big my belly is now. (To them it looks HUGE and to me, I feel huge). Ethan is so excited to be a big brother, and he's always so concerned about the baby. He likes to come up and rub my belly and he says .."baby".

We're down to 3 more months until she'll make her grand appearance, and I think I'll still need all that time to mentally get ready for being a mom to a precious little child of God again. I'm totally overwhelmed at the task at hand again, but knowing that this is the last one, make me want to be better at remembering these things.

So here are a few more pictures from the pregnancy.

 

Taken May 12, 2011  --- 23 Weeks 

 Taken May 26, 2011  -- 25 Weeks

 Taken June 15, 2011  ---  28 Weeks

 And here's my brave belly picture at 28 weeks. 

Can hardly believe I have a little human growing inside there.

It's a .....

GIRL!!! 

I was in denial at first because I was really hoping for a boy to even things out.  Ethan was a little sad that 

we found out this baby is a girl, but then I had to let him know, he gets to protect her and look out for her.  And when someone is being mean to his little sister he can tell them to be nice.  So I think it'll take some time, but he just might warm up to the idea.  So now, time to bring on the frill and lace again.  It's been a long time since I've had a little girl.  Seeing how my youngest daughter now is 8 and half, and will be 9 by the time this little girl arrives.  Crazy!!  

At least we got to see fingers on one of her hands and her cute little feet and everything looks good so far.   Name choices :  hmmm... we are thinking about Esther as a first name and really liking Rose with that name. = Esther Rose??    (Family names all around!)  According to their estimated weight of the baby she's about 13 oz already so almost a whole pound.  Yay... 

More for myself than anyone else.

So I've been busy working on yearbook pages in photoshop elements for the school my kids attend. We're coming down to the last few days/weeks, and my stress level is starting to PEAK!!

We've got birthday's coming up, volleyball games to attend, hunting for Easter eggs, and dying some as well. Lots of stuff is going on in the next few weeks, not to mention the item that I've been waiting for since, I found out I was expecting baby #6. So that maybe this child can go from being called baby #6 to "my little girl", or "my little boy". That's right I'm halfway through this pregnancy already and I have a list at least two pages long of things that need to be done before the baby arrives.

My anticipation of finding out is so huge right now, that I almost can't stand it. And I know that I'm going to be "hating" myself all day next Wednesday the 27th of April because I scheduled the ultrasound for 4pm that day!!! Did you hear me? I said 4 pm!!!

I did it mainly to accommodate schedules and such, so that the kidlets can all be there as well as my husband. But I know I'm going to be like a kid at Christmas waiting to see what the "big" gift is. Hopefully I'll be kept preoccupied with getting the yearbook finalized (or mostly anyway).

I've been feeling the baby move for almost 7 weeks now, and the movements are getting stronger every day. I can't believe how much movement I feel ALL THE TIME!! This kid is already all over the place in that little space it's in.

I've started a major project of "CLEAN UP THE DESK AND THE AREA AROUND IT" just yesterday, and now I can really see progress. The area underneath where our lovely feet are supposed to go, was cluttered with "CRAP". It's all gone now!! And I cleaned out the floor space where the paper shredder is supposed to go, and plugged it back in after being unusable for the last few months. I know-- huge slacker I am!! The part of the desk where the monitor sits, is now dejunked ... but unfortunately most of that mess just moved to the love seat to be "gone" through tomorrow.

I seriously have visions of a clean home that is spotless, and clutter free... but man oh man, it sure is hard trying to get there!! But hopefully with the new baby coming, and spring here ... I'll have some huge nesting instincts kick in and I can get a huge jump on a lot of the "clutter-free" cleaning that needs to take place. I have so many examples around me, that I just wish I could be like Samantha from Bewitched and twinkle my nose and it's immaculate. But alas, that isn't the life I get to live, so I have to be patient and do I dare say..."long-suffering" in waiting for that to happen.

My third OB appointment.

I had my third OB appointment last week on Wednesday March 23rd.

I haven't really gained any weight -- which is fine with me, since I started this one about 20 pounds heavier then I wanted to be. My blood pressure was fine ...actually I think they said it was kind of low. And asked if I was having issues with dizziness very often. Of course, I said YES. Because I have had those issues.

We listened to the babies heartbeat and Ethan's expression when he hears it is just so priceless. He really is excited for a new baby to come!

They measured me for the first time this checkup and I measured at 17 when they think I am only 15 weeks along. (That's a story all on it's own) I have self proclaimed my due date to be Sept 6th rather than the Sept 14th date that the early ultrasound gave. So according to that, I was 16 weeks and measuring at 17 isn't such a big deal then.  But who knows, we'll find out more at the next appointment.

So the DR. said that's a big growth. Matter of fact thats a HUGE growth!

But now we have our Ultrasound scheduled for the 27th of April. Which is Kaylee's 12th birthday!

My morning sickness isn't as severe as it was a month ago. I still have issues with nausea but at least it isn't 24/7 as it used to be. And I'm starting to have a little more energy then I did in February.  I still get tired pretty easily though.  And my five kids seriously keep me busy.                                                               

Here are a few pictures that I've taken so far.

6 weeks- a few days after we found out we were expecting.

Taken January 18th, 2011 

This is around 11 weeks. 

Taken February 18th, 2011 

And this is the most recent one taken around 15 weeks. 

Taken March 17th, 2011